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Part 8 - Examples of Good and Bad Writing. Learning to write often works best by example. The following are excerpts from nine first-year student essays. Most of the examples are bad, although I did find a two good examples in the bunch. In most cases, the names and dates from the essays have been changed to woodstock thesis, not compromise the subject matter for future students (in other words, don't use any of the apparent research information here in eyre essay, your papers).
I have tried to categorize the errors as best as I could. Errors or bad portions are usually bolded to woodstock thesis, help you identify them. Smith was a religious, Christian man. His notion of monads included contextual references to God. He believed that God controls the harmony of life through these monads. The essay then goes on to discuss these monads in a Christian context. Had the student omitted the above sentences, however, the discussion of religion would have been completely out of place, given the essay's topic. But since the person being discussed had religious views that affected his theories and thesis, work, it is relevant to mention the religious aspect. Had Smith's religion not been a direct influence on his work, it would have been irrelevant. Similarly, you wouldn't mention other things about someone in an essay if it wasn't relevant to the topic. For example, it is irrelevant to mention a scientist's race in an essay about their discovery unless the race impacted the discovery.
An example of this might be if a black scientist's prime motivation to find a cure for sickle cell anemia was because that disease strikes black people in proportionally higher numbers. If the same scientist was researching some aspect of physics, it would probably not be relevant to mention the race at all. An introductory paragraph: On March 4, 1849, John Smith was born to Anna Bradcock Smith and James Smith. Although certainly not of thesis humble origins, John was acquainted with several prominent and jane eyre essay, influential men of woodstock thesis politics with whom he discussed matters of mathematics, history, science, logic, law, and theology. Smith was brilliant in each of these fields, but he became known particularly for his contributions in the fields of philosophy, mathematics, and logistics. This paper will not only shed light on some of Smith's theories and words regarding these three areas, but will also tell of the events in his life that made him the man that he was. This is the introduction to a chronologically-ordered essay about eyre gothic, Smith's life and discoveries. Woodstock? As such, the choice to begin with his date of birth is a good one. Jane Eyre Essay? The paragraph summarizes the fields touched by Smith and also mentions the key areas he studied. The paper sets up an expectation for the reader of both a detailed explanation of Smith's discoveries and anecdotes describing his personality.
The sentence structure is grammatically sound and flows well. In the late 1650's , Smith's mother returned to woodstock thesis, London , she then pulled him out of school with the intent to research paper aneurysm, make him a farmer . Apostrophes indicate possessiveness or contractions, not plurality. The decade is the woodstock thesis 1650s. Jane Eyre Gothic Essay? The sentence is a run-on. It should either end after London, beginning a new sentence with She then, or the thesis she then should be changed to and. To make someone a farmer is to create a farmer for them. And Nutrition? The student meant: to turn him into thesis, a farmer or to encourage him to be a farmer. Smith invented the widgetiscope and paved the way for future widget watching.
All-the-while remaining a simple and humble man who considered himself to be part of a team working for the greater good. The bolded part is on my to become an army officer, not a complete sentence. The entire thing should be one sentence. Woodstock? All-the-while does not require hyphenation. The two differing approaches of development already described, eventually led to the development of the and nutrition two original branches of widgetry; fingleish and fnordleish. This sentence is mispunctuated. The comma is confusing and should be removed, and the semicolon should be a colon. Another of Smith's ideas was the method of differentiation.
The university re-opened after the plague in woodstock thesis, 1667. Smith was elected to a minor fellowship, and research, awarded a major fellowship after he received his Master's Degree (Bogus 4). After the realization that Calculus was important, and was being recognized, a document to record all of the woodstock theories became a necessity. Jane Essay? The Methodis Differantium, the document that contained the elements of the theory of differentiation, was created in 1667. Woodstock Thesis? Smith believed he was being pulled in two directions when it came to publishing his theories and making his work known. He felt a need for fame and fortune, yet on the other hand he had an abundant fear of rejection. Survey Question? To the dismay of many future mathematicians, it was never published because of Smith's fear of criticism. Since he was not focusing on publishing his work, Smith pursued his career as a professor. This so-called paragraph is an utter mess.
There are far too many ideas in it, all of which are strung together haphazardly without any logical flow. I'll try to woodstock, dissect and rewrite it, but I won't make errors bold because the entire paragraph would be bold if I did. First, let's pick out the clinical dissertation different topics being addressed: the method of differentiation the university re-opening after the plague Smith's ascension through the woodstock thesis university ranks the need of jane a document detailing differentiation, which was eventually created Smith's mental state, desires and fears. Now, if we replace each sentence with the number of the woodstock corresponding idea, we can see what a jumbled mess this is: 1, 2, 3, 4, 4, 5, 5, 4, 3. Don't introduce a paragraph with one topic and clinical, then leap to another topic in the next sentence.
While it may sometimes be necessary to mention something as an aside to complement the woodstock topic, the return to the topic should be swift and eyre essay, easy to understand. Don't bounce around within the paragraph as this student has done. Another problem: there doesn't seem to thesis, be a coherent timeline within the paragraph. Did the university re-open in 1667, or was the plague in 1667? Is the student saying that Smith was elected to essay example, a minor fellowship that year or another year? Similarly, when did the major fellowship and woodstock thesis, Master's Degree come in? It's unlikely to have all happened in one year, though it is possible. The document was created in 1667, it seems, but when did Smith decide not to publish and seek work as a professor instead?
Also 1667? It sounds like that was a very busy year for poor Smith! The sentences themselves are also awkwardly constructed, making the entire thing hard to essay and nutrition, understand. I'll make some assumptions regarding the confusing date information. Here is how this information should have been presented: Smith's ideas on the method of differentiation were gaining recognition in the mathematical community, which made it necessary for him to produce a document detailing all of his theories on the subject. Thus, when the university re-opened in 1667 following the plague and Smith was elected to woodstock thesis, a minor fellowship, he wrote Methodis Differantium. Although Smith wished to attain fame and fortune, he also feared rejection. Aim Is Officer? This dichotomy resulted in his failure to publish Methodis Differantium; a failure that would be mourned by mathematicians well into the future.
Still, Smith was awarded a major fellowship after receiving his Master's Degree in [insert year]. Woodstock Thesis? Since he was not interested in gothic essay, publishing his work, he concentrated instead on pursuing a position as a professor. Queen Esmerelda knighted Jones in 1705 to be given the title of woodstock thesis Sir Joe Smith, which made him the first scientist to be so honored for jane eyre essay, his work (Bogus) . The phrase to be given is awkward here. It would be better written: Queen Esmerelda knighted Jones in 1705, which gave him the title of Sir. Who else could be honoured for Smith's work other than Smith? It should say: . which made him the first man to be honored for scientific work. There probably should be a page number listed in woodstock, the citation. Jones had a main idea of research on brain aneurysm analytic geometry.
What does this mean? Does the student mean that one of Jones' main ideas concerned analytic geometry? Does he mean that one of the main ideas of analytic geometry was conceived by Jones? Or does he mean something else entirely? This makes little sense and woodstock thesis, is very awkward. Whether Smith made no use of the manuscript from essay an army which he had copied abstracts , or whether he had previously invented the woodstock thesis widgetiscope, are questions on example which at this distance of time no direct evidence is available . If Smith made no use of the manuscript, he can't have used it to copy abstracts. This is a very awkward way of saying that the events in question happened so long ago that there is no longer sufficient evidence to answer certain questions.
It would be better written: Questions as to woodstock thesis, whether Smith made further use of the manuscript from which he copied abstracts or whether he had previously invented the psychology widgetiscope are rooted so far in the past that it is impossible to gather sufficient direct evidence to provide answers. This is still a bit awkward. Woodstock Thesis? It's best when broken up into smaller sentences: There are still questions as to whether Smith made further use of the manuscript from which he copied abstracts or whether he had previously invented the survey widgetiscope. Such questions are rooted so far in woodstock, the past, however, that it is impossible to on health, gather sufficient direct evidence to provide answers. Smith formed a political plan to try to persuade the Germans to woodstock thesis, attack the French due to him not agreeing with their political agendas and this proved the means of his visiting Hamburg. Due to jane gothic essay, him not agreeing with is a very awkward way of saying: because he disagreed with.
The second bolded part should be a separate sentence. Woodstock Thesis? Proved the means of his visiting is a very awkward way of saying is why he visited. Jones explained ideas too enormous to understand, and simplified problems too complex to approach. Not only is this hyperbole, it's also logically impossible. If the ideas were too complicated to jane eyre, understand, Jones couldn't have understood them himself. If the problems were too complex to woodstock thesis, approach, Jones could not have approached them. Mismatched Words, Phrases, and Pronouns. After marrying Elizabeth, Smith's father fell ill for several months. After no sign of recovery, a lawyer was summoned to the manor. A will was drawn up, including one hundred acres of land, the manor house, livestock, grain, and Smith Senior's death (Bogus 10). His mother gave birth to Smith three months after Smith senior died.
He was premature after suffering from illness due to research on brain, the shock of her husband's passing during the fall . The phrase after no sign of recovery is woodstock, not properly attached to Smith's father. Instead, it is saying that the lawyer did not recover from survey question something. A will does not include land, a house, etc. It states to whom such things are bequeathed. This should say: A will was drawn up leaving one hundred acres of land, the manor house, livestock and grain to [whomever]. I don't even understand how and Smith Senior's death fits into woodstock thesis, this sentence.
His in the sentence His mother gave birth. refers to the antecedent Smith Senior. Paper On Brain Aneurysm? Thus, Smith Senior's mother gave birth to Smith Senior's son. That would necessitate incest, and is clearly not what the student meant to say. They should have simply said Elizabeth gave birth. Who else but someone's mother gives birth to them anyway? Given the woodstock thesis confusions regarding the various Smiths, it would have been better if the aim is to become an army officer student had used first names during this part of the essay. There is inconsistency in woodstock, capitalization. It is Smith Senior once, and paper, Smith senior another time. The he in he was premature again refers to woodstock thesis, the wrong antecedent.
Smith Senior was not premature. Smith did not suffer illness due to the shock of Smith Senior's passing. Jane Eyre Gothic? Elizabeth did. This sentence says that Smith suffered the illness. The student suddenly introduces the phrase during the fall when no other mention of the season has been made. This could be confused with Smith Senior dying from a fall. Lastly, the inverse relationship between area and the tangent were never attained. The relationship is singular, even though it refers to woodstock thesis, multiple elements. Thus, the verb were should be singular as well, and changed to was.
It was this century where many of the worlds most honorable and highly respected mathematicians created what we know today as calculus. A century is not a place, it is a section of clinical psychology dissertation time. Woodstock Thesis? Say it is a place where. or a time when. In this case, It was this century when. And Nutrition? Adding an thesis 's' without an apostrophe in this case is pluralization, not indicative of possession. Essay On My Aim Is To Become An Army Officer? The student means world's. But perhaps the largest obstacle , which the Greeks could not overcome, were their insufficient number and measuring system . Were is plural, but obstacle and system are singular. It should be was. Tragically at the age of thesis six, Smith's father died. This says that Smith's father died at the age of six.
The student means: Tragically, when Smith was six years old his father died. Jones, now familiar with Smith's discoveries, wrote Smith a letter soon after the publication of his discoveries. After the publication of whose discoveries: Jones' or Smith's? Jones reasoned that if he could calculate the angles of the on brain projected colour, a new law of refraction could be made . People can make legal laws, but natural or scientific laws are discovered. To make a new law of refraction, Jones would have to alter physics. During the seventeenth century, the inhabitants of England did not realize the importance of scientific advancement. Inhabitants could well mean non-human creatures, and is thus a poor choice of a word. Are we to understand that ALL of the people in England failed to realize the importance of scientific advancement for an entire century?
It would have been better if the student had said most people in England. At the current time, the dominant belief was that light traveled in wave . The current time is the moment the reader is reading the sentence. The student meant to say that the woodstock thesis belief was such during the historical time period being discussed. Current should be omitted. The phrase in essay, wave has an error. It should either be in waves or in a wave. Both may be correct, but such an thesis error can be misunderstood if one is eyre gothic, incorrect. This would likely have been caught if the student had read the paper out loud. Secondly, Jones' reliance on geometric algebra rather than symbolic notation created considerable impedance to the identification of solutions of woodstock computational features found frequently to different problems.
Here is an example of a student not knowing the research on brain proper meaning of woodstock thesis a word. Impedance means opposition to the flow of electric current. It does not mean the same as to sport example, impede, which is to be an obstacle. This could be an thesis instance where a student used the thesaurus in a word processor to come up with a word without bothering to check if the word fit the context. Psychology? It could also simply be that the woodstock student had mislearned the word themselves. Incidentally, a quick check of MS Word 97 shows synonyms to impedance to aim is an army officer, be obstruction, block, baffle, hindrance, breakwater, fin, and maze. So here is direct proof that you shouldn't always trust what a word processor thesaurus tells you is an equivalent word.
Be diligent and look up unfamiliar words in the dictionary before using them in your essay. In studying widgetry, it serves as great importance that one is aware of the two systems of woodstock widgetry; fingleish and fnordleish. Something does not serve as great importance, and one being aware doesn't fit either. This is a student trying to sport essay, sound fancy but instead making no sense. The sentence should read: In studying widgetry, one should be aware of the two systems of widgetry; fingleish and woodstock, fnordleish. It was thought that Jones hated his stepfather and his mother, partly for abandoning him at such a young age. Who thought so?
This entire statement, which implies something that cannot be proven and is thus not a basic fact, had no attribution in and nutrition, the essay. Since it was about someone historical and the student couldn't possibly have known this unless they got it from a source, it was plagiarism to include it without attribution. Smith managed one friendship through this time and the value of that is thesis, always questioned. Who is questioning the value? There is on brain, no attribution to explain who questions it or to prove that it is questioned by anyone other than the student. What precisely is being questioned? The value of only thesis, having one friend, or the value of the one friendship to Smith in particular? . which means that the clinical dissertation cut in the # of points is equal to the degree of the curve.
Using the # symbol instead of the word number is woodstock, a bad short cut, and eyre essay, certainly inappropriate for a formal essay. Smith also helped to improve the scientific community ; his focus was mainly regarding widgetry. How does a focus on a subject help to improve a community? It might improve the understanding of the subject in woodstock thesis, the community, but does that improve the community itself? This is a badly worded assertion. Essay On My Aim Is? If it truly did benefit the woodstock thesis scientific community as a whole, the student should cite a source demonstrating that to be the case. No attribution was present.
In one day, John's attitude towards school changed for the better. A boy ranked just above him kicked him in dissertation, the stomach. At the end of the day John challenged the boy to a fight. Even though John was much smaller than his opponent, his determination overtook the boy. Winning the fight was still not enough. John applied himself in class, and woodstock, soon became the top student in the school. This entire paragraph introduces an anecdote for the purpose of explaining what drove John to become a better student. Incredibly, it manages to completely fail to mention the relationship between the anecdote and John's new-found classroom enthusiasm. The relationship is implied and the reader can guess that John wished to survey question, beat the boy in more than just a physical fight, and thus worked hard to outrank the boy in the classroom, but that is woodstock, not stated.
The paragraph is very choppy and the sentences do not flow well. Read it out loud, and you'll hear how it sounds like a grade school book instead of a university essay. During this time, Smith constructed a water clock. He constructed the clock out of an old box. This is choppy. Aim Is To Become An Army Officer? It could be easily combined into one sentence. Jones became began to study motion.
This error was probably due to a sentence that once legitimately contained the word became being edited without became being removed. Woodstock Thesis? If the student had read the essay out loud or given it to a friend to read, this error likely would have been noticed. Yet, in research paper on brain, 1679, Jones would discover that his initial calculation the Moon's distance from Earth was incorrect. Here is another example of a simple error of omission that could have been caught if the student had read the essay aloud or given it to a friend to read. The word of should be between calculation and the. Woodstock? That one small error makes the entire sentence awkward and confusing. If the instructor has to reread the sentence to try to understand its meaning, the flow of the essay is interrupted. Psychology Dissertation? If this happens often enough in the essay, it gives an thesis overall bad impression on what otherwise might be a very good paper in terms of dissertation research. More examples of woodstock thesis errors that could have been caught if the students had bothered to read their essay:
One of Smith's main contribution was his use of. Widgetry emphasized the notion of the infinite widget, which in fact cam as a great service to Smith in that it served as an thesis survey question important too in helping explain his branch of widgetry. Jones might have in fact perputuated the woodstock ideas, but he was also at thesis, a loss when he could not make good sense of them from the beginning. Admiration for Smith grew in the filed of widgetry. With Jones' encouragement, Smith drafter a number of woodstock thesis monographs on research paper religious topics. Smith considers out universe to be a gravitational system. On August 10, 1777, Jones was ent a letter from. In later research , it was proven that Jones was incorrect and woodstock thesis, science rejected his theories about light until the next century.
Thus, it was scientifically proven that Jones' theories about quanta (tiny particulate packets of sport essay energy) were indeed correct . The wave formulation was also correct . When was this later research? Who performed the research? In discussing whether someone was proven incorrect or not, it is a good idea to fully explain who did the proving when, and possibly even how they came to their conclusion. These sentences contradict each other. Was Jones proven incorrect or correct? Does the student mean that Jones was erroneously proven incorrect, but science later found that he was correct after all? Or was Jones correct about woodstock thesis, some things and not others?
The use of Thus implies causality. How does the thesis survey proof that Jones is incorrect and the rejection by science suddenly become scientific proof of his theory being correct? Regardless of woodstock what the student meant by the flip from incorrect to thesis survey question, correct, there is nothing given to woodstock thesis, establish causality. It's disappointing to see such sloppiness as this in an essay. Survey? This particular essay featured clipart, so it was obviously done on a computer with a modern word processor. It clearly wasn't spell-checked.
Such complete disregard is automatically indicative of a student who doesn't care about thesis, their final product, and while the error itself is minor, it gives a bad impression to the grader. Survey? In fact, this essay had several spelling errors that could have been caught. Woodstock? That's inexcusable at the university level. It was also during this time that he traveled to his uncle's place in Brunswick. Place is colloquial. Use home, apartment, residence or other such appropriate word instead. Smith attempted to obtain his doctorate of thesis survey question law degree at woodstock, the University of Anytown but was denied because positions were being held for the older students -- and Smith was much too young. Smith's secretary claims that he was told many times, however, that Smith was denied admission because of negative feelings that the Dean's wife held for clinical psychology, him.
Smith's secretary is probably dead, since this essay is about someone from the 19th century. Therefore, they no longer claim anything. It should be past tense. Since the woodstock student doesn't cite this, there is an survey implication that perhaps the secretary is not dead and the student went so far as to interview the thesis secretary personally. And Nutrition? That is, of course, quite unlikely, meaning that this student has plagiarised this information from one of their sources.
The following are a few concepts that form the basis of Leibnizian calculus: [followed by three bulleted paragraphs comprised mostly of direct quotation] Using bullets in a formal essay is woodstock thesis, rarely appropriate. It is preferable to write out the bulleted information into proper paragraph form. This student seems to have been too lazy to bother paraphrasing a bunch of example direct quotations into woodstock, a formal essay structure. Along came the Joe Smith, a mathematician considered by numerous scholars to be a pioneer of calculus, including other renowned mathematician, Bill Jones. The Joe Smith? There has only been one? The student means another, not other. Sloppy. The first page of the essay starts with: have been developed (5).
The second page starts with the header Introduction and the opening paragraph. Clearly, the essay example student stapled the pages out of order. What a sloppy mistake! Pages should be numbered unless you're specifically instructed not to for some reason, and thesis, you should always ensure that all of the pages are present and in proper order before binding the essay. If the instructor has to begin by paper aneurysm, figuring out what the heck is going on, they will automatically have a bad impression of your essay and possibly of you. Jones was quite a busy man in that along with his position in the Court of Mainz, he also managed to serve as Baron Johann Christian von Boineburg as secretary, librarian, lawyer, advisor, assistant, and woodstock thesis, most importantly, friend. Quite a busy man is a bit colloquial.
A busy man would do. Essay On Health And Nutrition? The first as is an woodstock thesis error, since Jones did not serve as the essay Baron, he served the Baron. This may have been caught if the student had read their essay out loud. His Chummy, Bill Jones, who Smith shared a room with until his resignation from this fellowship in 1683. Chummy should only woodstock, be included if it was Smith's actual word for Jones. If this is the case, it is a quotation from a source and should be cited. If not, it is colloquial and should just say His friend Bill Jones. Who should be whom in this case. A site called Grammar and Style has information on how to essay, use who and whom.
This isn't even a complete sentence. Smith was born prematurely and woodstock, was so small when he was born that they thought he might not live. Repeating that he was born is redundant. Who does they refer to? Doctors? Parents?
Relatives? Townsfolk? It is a pronoun without an antecedent. In this publication, Jones has a discourse between the belief systems of the jane eyre gothic essay natural philosophical world around him. Has is the wrong word here because the woodstock thesis essay is psychology dissertation, about a person who is now dead. Dead people don't have discourse with anyone in the present, so the word should at least be had. But even had is awkward, and a better word would be wrote. Discourse means to converse, especially orally.
One does not speak orally in a publication. It is written. This word should be omitted. Between denotes at least two participants, but Jones is the only one having the supposed discourse. This too should be omitted. Natural philosophical world is confusing. Does the woodstock student mean the natural, philosophical world, which would be the essay on health and nutrition world described as both natural and philosophical? Or do they mean natural philosophical world, in which natural modifies philosophical and not world, in which case the grammatically correct phrase would be naturally philosophical world? This would be better written as:
In this publication, Jones wrote of the belief systems of the thesis natural, philosophical world around him. or, depending on the answer to the fourth point: In this publication, Jones wrote of the belief systems of the example naturally philosophical world around him. He was home for woodstock thesis, approximately 18 months, according to Jones the 18 months was the most predominant time period of example his life. This is woodstock thesis, a run-on sentence. It should either end between 18 months and according, or it should be rewritten to make it a proper sentence.
18 months is repeated for no reason. 18 months is plural, so it should be 18 months were not 18 months was. Predominant means superior especially in power or numbers. Something cannot be most superior. Most should be omitted. Predominant is not the best word in this case anyway. Clinical Dissertation? If the student means it was the most powerful time of thesis Jones' life, they should be clear about that. If they mean it was the most superior numerical time of his life, then he logically cannot have been more than 36 months old. Simpson was content after his ability to reproduce Smith's experiment. Jones was not that easy, the two men fought constantly.
The student probably means that Simpson was content once he was able to reproduce Smith's experiment. The current phrasing doesn't quite say that, and is awkward and confusing. Jones was not that easy to what? The student probably means Jones was not that easy to essay, satisfy or something equivalent. This is a run-on sentence.
It should end after easy, or be rewritten to be grammatically correct. Which two men? Simpson and Jones or Smith and Jones? The information on physics before this section is important to understanding whom Newton was, but arguably, his greatest advancements were in the field of mathematics, most importantly Calculus. Incorrect use of whom. Should be who.
A site called Grammar and Style has information on how to use who and whom. There should not be a comma between arguably and his. There is no citation as to anyone arguing that Newton's greatest advancements were in woodstock, mathematics. This might be because it would be difficult to prove in the face of the importance of paper on brain aneurysm Newtonian physics. Advancements is probably the wrong word. Achievements or discoveries would be better.
Newton's advancements are more likely to be funds paid in advance of publication. Thesis? The addition of most importantly is awkward. Particularly would have been a better word. The use of greatest and most importantly referring to Calculus is hyperbole. Given that this essay was for a Calculus class, it sounds like a kiss-up. Jane Eyre Essay? The declarations of superiority are superfluous, unattributed, probably erroneous, and possibly pandering. It's all very ugly. A concluding sentence: Smith's great work, theories, and studies will continue to woodstock thesis, live on forever in the ever-changing world of science and mathematics . How can the student know that Smith's work will live on forever? That's an impossible assertion to make.
Work, theories and studies don't live. Psychology? They exist, but they are not organic creatures. Woodstock? If the world is thesis, ever-changing, how again can the student know that Smith's work won't one day be considered nonsense? Or lost entirely? World is singular, but it refers to two worlds, one of science and one of mathematics. This conclusion reeks of hyperbole. Woodstock? (So does the phrase reeks of hyperbole, but this is not a formal essay.) A scientist before Smith by eyre essay, the name of Jones knew that he could demonstrate the ration between two infinite sums.
The phrasing here is a bit awkward. It would be better phrased: Jones, a predecessor of Smith, knew that. Ration is the woodstock thesis wrong word. Sport Essay Example? The student meant ratio. This is one of those errors that a spell-check cannot find, but if the thesis essay had been read aloud it may have been noticed. One man was proclaiming to be the inventor of the widgetiscope and another man was proclaiming the exact same thing; who is telling the truth? The main problem here is the change in tense. You can't go from was to thesis question, is if the woodstock subject remains fixed in time.
Furthermore, it is incorrect to refer to someone who is dead as doing anything in the present besides being dead (and possibly rotting). A dead person is not telling anything right now, but they were in the past. Essay An Army? Try to avoid using the thesis passive form was proclaiming and instead use proclaimed. This particular statement is also bad because of the sport subject matter. Woodstock? The student has already shown in the essay that both men happened to independently invent the widgetiscope, but the issue is essay example, who deserved the woodstock thesis title for inventing it first . So actually, neither one was necessarily lying, and the student should not make it appear that one or the other may have been doing so. You must be careful not to libel people. The phrasing here is awkward and possibly a bit too conversational in the final question. A better way of writing this would be:
Two men proclaimed to be the inventor of calculus, but only one could be given the credit. The argument was so drawn out that a decision was not easy to come by which worked against Smith's favor. Jones had been considered the sole inventor of the widgetiscope for eyre essay, fifteen years already, which gave him the upper hand. The student meant to woodstock thesis, say that the duration of the argument caused Smith to lose. Dissertation? But because the student failed to put the necessary comma between the bolded words, this sentence actually says, by means of a complicated string of multiple negatives, that it was not easy to come to a decision against Smith, meaning he won. Woodstock Thesis? This sentence would be better worded this way: Because the argument took so long, Smith lost.
But then, at the beginning of the next paragraph, the student writes: The argument took years to unravel and never really came to jane eyre, a definitive decision. This negates what the thesis student had asserted before: that Smith lost because of the duration of the argument. This also repeats the fact that it was a long argument, which is essay officer, redundant. It was from the Greeks, where the woodstock underlying of widgetry emerged and set the basis of what widgetry has become. The Greeks are a people, not a place, so things come from whom, not where. The comma in this sentence should not be there. Research Paper On Brain? It sets up an expectation that the woodstock portion after the comma is thesis question, a separate clause, as in: It was from the Greeks, who also invented blodgetry, that widgetry came forth. Woodstock Thesis? Note that because the who is in clinical psychology, the separate clause, it should not be whom. Woodstock Thesis? The underlying what ? You can't just say the underlying of widgetry. It has to be the dissertation underlying something of widgetry, whether that something is basis, foundation, etc.
Although there was a time of intellectual heightening , there came a period of thesis darkness in the development of mathematics (Ewards 45) . Intellectual heightening is an icky, awkward phrase. Psychology? Intellectual development would have been much better. In going over this old essay, I wondered if perhaps this was a typo of the name Edwards. I checked the bibliography to confirm the name, and discovered that nothing by Ewards, Edwards, or any similar name was there at all. Had this gone noticed when the paper was being graded, serious questions would have been raised as to the validity of the student's sources and bibliography. Be sure to woodstock, list all sources in your bibliography, and psychology, be sure to spell them correctly when citing! One motive of Sumerian algebra was to impose on themselves a concepts that they could not fully understand and precisely compute, and for this reason, rejected concepts of irrational as numbers, all traces of the infinite, such as limit concepts, from their own mathematics. Motive applies to Sumerian algebra, not Sumerians. Woodstock Thesis? Therefore, that motive cannot be imposed on themselves. It should be written: One motive of the Sumerians concerning their algebra was to impose on themselves. although that is still an awkward phrase.
Concepts should not be plural. This is sloppiness that probably could have been detected if the student had bothered to read over his essay. The sentence should end after compute. A new sentence should begin, For this reason. The word they should be put between reason and rejected to say: For this reason, they rejected concepts. This sentence is survey, so garbled with mismatched subclauses that adding another is woodstock thesis, just icky.
I'd put such as limit concepts in parenthesis, or rewrite the sentence to bring that idea out on its own. If Greek rigor had surmounted their need to succeed in these elements and refused to use real numbers and limits till they had finally understood them, calculus may have never formed and mathematics as a whole would be obsolete (Apostal 102). The verb refused applies to sport essay example, Greek rigor, not Greeks, which is nonsensical. Be careful to ensure that your verbs match the woodstock thesis subject you intend for them. Don't use till when you mean until. That's colloquial at best, and not really a proper use of the word at all at worst. Essay On My An Army Officer? The proper phrase is have never been formed.
To say something never formed begs the question: What didn't it form? Even though there is a citation for this extreme declaration that mathematics as a whole would be obsolete, it's still probably hyperbole. I wonder if the source actually said that, or if the student's paraphrasing has overstated the source's point that mathematics might be different without the advent of calculus. Be careful that you don't paraphrase in such a way as to woodstock thesis, claim a source said something that they did not. If this source really says mathematics would be obsolete without calculus, it's a bad source. Such a statement would render even basic arithmetic and counting as obsolete, which is ridiculous. Essentially , it is thesis survey question, a case of Smith's word against a number of suspicious details pointing against him. He acknowledged possession of woodstock a copy of part of one of Jones' manuscripts, on research paper aneurysm more than one occasion he deliberately altered or added to important documents before publishing them, and woodstock, a material date I none of his manuscripts had been falsified (1675 had been changed to 1673) (Bogus, 78) Essentially isn't technically incorrect here, but students do have a tendency to use words like essentially and on brain aneurysm, basically too often. It's somewhat conversational, and woodstock, possibly colloquial.
Try to avoid it unless something is truly essential. A number of suspicious details pointing against him is an awkward way of saying: suspicions of paper on brain his guilt. But what the student means is not suspicions, but points of evidence. When you list several examples of thesis something you've indicated, the way to punctuate it is as follows (note the placement of the colon and subsequent semicolons): [Point being made]:[proof 1];[proof 2];[proof 3]; and[proof 4]. This way each proof can have punctuation such as commas without being confused with other points, and each proof still points to the main part of the sentence. This entire thing should be rewritten to say: It is clinical psychology, a case of woodstock Smith's word against the evidence of his guilt: he acknowledged possession of a copy of Jones' manuscripts; on more than one occasion he deliberately altered or added to essay officer, important documents before publishing them; and his manuscripts had been falsified by changing 1675 to 1673 (Bogus, 78). After quoting a dictionary definition: The editors of the famous dictionary are probably unaware of the fact that they have just committed a cardinal sin in thesis, the mathematical world , in that they only essay example, described fingleish widgetry, and failed to include an explanation of fnordleish widgetry. It's okay to question a source, and at higher levels of education it might even be required. But if you're going to do it, be careful to do it well and with evidence.
This just sounds presumptuous. Thesis? The student has not shown whether or not the jane essay dictionary has separate definitions for woodstock, widgetry or otherwise accounts for its apparent lack of sufficient definition. Saying the on my to become dictionary is famous is probably unnecessary, and woodstock thesis, possibly hyperbole. Research Paper? A cardinal sin is woodstock thesis, a sin of fundamental importance. In the thesis question Judeo-Christian context, this would mean something very bad, like murder.
Thus, calling a disagreement in definition in a dictionary a cardinal sin is definitely hyperbole. Even if it was a cardinal sin, the sin was committed in woodstock thesis, the dictionary, not in the mathematical world. The student meant against the mathematical world. It is surprising how people could be satisfied such a vague definition, as was the case in sport example, Webster's Dictionary, on a subject that has tested such great minds for centuries upon centuries . It is surprising how students could be satisfied with such drivel in woodstock thesis, their essays. That sounds nasty, doesn't it? That's because it is. Sentences like this are insulting and off-putting, and don't belong in a formal essay. Essay? Such great minds requires an example. The word such should be omitted. Centuries upon woodstock, centuries is redundant. Just say centuries and essay, leave it at that.
Jones' first object in thesis, Paris was to make contact with the French government but, while waiting for such an opportunity, he made contact with mathematicians and philosophers there, in particular Davis and research paper, Myers, discussing with Davis a variety of topics but particularly church reunification (Bugle 57). An object is a thing. The student means Jones' first objective. This is a bad run-on. It should be broken up like this: Jones' first objective in Paris was to make contact with the French government, but while waiting for an opportunity to do so, he made contact with mathematicians and philosophers such as Davis and woodstock, Myers. He discussed a variety of thesis topics with Davis, particularly church reunification (Bugle 57). Smith's contribution to math has helped our society become more technological in building things . In this particular case, Smith made many contributions, not just one. Math is the colloquial version of mathematics. Did Smith's contributions only thesis, help our society? What about other societies?
More technological in building things is research paper, a really awkward way of saying improved our technological aptitude. Undoubtedly, Jones was one of the greatest geniuses that ever lived and this paper will demonstrate that, starting from woodstock thesis his childhood until his death . Smith may have been a genius, but to blow that up to one of the greatest geniuses that ever lived is question, hyperbole. Even if it is true, the paper didn't demonstrate it because the paper didn't compare Smith to other great geniuses that have lived. The paper showed that Smith was a genius, perhaps, but not his rank amongst all of the geniuses that have ever lived. If you start from something, you go to or follow through to thesis, another something. The phrase starting from his childhood until his death actually means you're starting from the section of time inclusively between his childhood and and nutrition, death and not saying where you're going.
Furthermore, the thesis paper does not start from thesis survey question Smith's childhood because it was not being written when Smith was a child. The student means, starting with his childhood and following through to his death. That is still awkward, and the sentence would be best written: Undoubtedly, Jones was a genius, and this paper will demonstrate that by examining his entire life. So John lived for seven years with his mother's parents who did not really show him any affection . So in this context is colloquial and should be omitted.
This really should be cited. Thesis? John's address may be a matter of public record and therefore doesn't have to be cited, but comments on the emotional quality of the household imply research, and the student should give credit to the source. Really is colloquial, and should be omitted. While at Cambridge, Smith's genius was most productive in his dedication to math . Who is Smith's genius? The student means Smith's intellect, but an intellect cannot be productive. It facilitates productivity, but it is not productive itself. A better way to write this would be: Smith's intellect was best displayed in his dedication. Math is colloquial. It should be mathematics.
This information helps us to understand how we, as humans stay on the ground; we are matter as well and do have an invisible force weighing us down as we push against it and it pushes back against us . Sport Essay? This hand full of knowledge has helped our scientist understand our universe of thesis heavenly bodies and their movement. Thesis Survey? It has also allowed scientist to delve further in exploring our galaxy. Does gravity only affect humans? Granted, the student is trying to woodstock, make the science seem more personal, but this is an awkward way of doing it. It is also something that seems to indicate an essay geared to essay on my aim is to become officer, children. While you should usually write essays so they can be understood by laypersons, you can assume those laypersons are your age and intellectual peers. Thesis? The description of the invisible force is essay, very awkward. Woodstock? A better wording would be: do have an sport invisible force that we push against as it pushes back against us. Gravity does not, in fact, weigh people down. Woodstock? The student's own definition of it earlier in the essay mentions this, and here too it is accurately described as a push, not a pull. To add in the bit about it weighing us down is contradictory.
The student means handful. This is a bad description anyway, since the student is jane eyre gothic essay, trying to show how this knowledge is monumental to scientists. Woodstock? Both instances of scientist should be pluralized. Essay To Become? One delves further into something, not in it. The Royal Society always had someone coming in each week they met to show off their invention . Always had someone coming in is colloquial and awkward. It should say: The Royal Society hosted a guest each week. The second part of woodstock thesis this is a separate sentence and should be capitalized and punctuated accordingly, or else brought into the first sentence with appropriate conjunctions. Show off is example, colloquial.
Demonstrate would be better. Since more than one invention was demonstrated, invention should be plural. A concluding paragraph: Jones was a great man who made an impact in woodstock thesis, all of our lives . He is recognized as one of the centuries brilliant-minded people who helped to further math along. This intellectual man has created something which has and will be used for years to come.
This is an important part of history which will and paper on brain aneurysm, should never be forgotten. The essay has shown that Jones was brilliant and invented some useful things. Woodstock? It has not, however, demonstrated that he was a great man. A great man is survey question, one that embodies greatness in all things, including attitude, relationships with others, and their contributions to their society. Jones may have been all of thesis this, but the essay did not reflect it, so it is hyperbole to declare it in the conclusion. It is essay on health and nutrition, also a highly subjective comment; what makes someone great to one person may not for another. Centuries is the plural of century, not the possessive. The student means century's. But Jones was not of our current century, so the student should define which century they mean.
Impacts are made on, not in. If by all of woodstock thesis us the student means everyone on the planet, this is clinical, incorrect. Jones' contributions to mathematics hardly impact the thesis life of someone living in a non-literate, non-industrialized society. Even if the student merely means her peers, it is still hyperbole to declare that everyone has been impacted. If you're going to mention that the person did something in your conclusion, mention what that something is. While it is unlikely that Jones' history will be forgotten, the student cannot effectively predict the future in this way. Some of essay to become an army these comments may seem nitpicky, but the fact of the matter is errors such as these reflect poorly on you and woodstock, your essay. No one is perfect, and research, an essay with one or two awkward phrases won't be marked down just for woodstock, those instances. But an clinical psychology dissertation essay that is full of the errors listed above prevents the thesis reader from understanding the content. If the instructor doesn't know what you mean, they can't possibly give you a good grade. Last updated in February 2005.
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a critcal essay Hello, my name is Robin Banerjee and I'm a senior lecturer in the Department of Psychology at the University of Sussex. I teach many first year, second year and third year students so if you come into thesis, the Psychology department I'm sure I'll see lots of you while you're here. Today I'm going to be talking a little bit about guidelines for writing essays. Now I'm sure that when you've got essays to write you'll find lots of different instructions to follow for the different assignments that you've got, and and nutrition of course you'll have to pay attention to woodstock thesis them. But what I'm going to essay on my to become an army give you today are some helpful guidelines which I hope will be useful to you as you set about the task of writing an woodstock thesis, essay. 1. Come up with a clear line of argument.
Well, my first guideline for writing an essay is to make sure that you have a clear line of survey question argument. If the essay title is in thesis, the form of on health a question -- this might seem obvious -- answer the question. Although it seems like an obvious point, I've read many essays where student simply don't answer the question. They'll talk about lots of things that relate to the question but they don't actually give you an answer to the question. So if the title is in thesis, the form of a question, make sure you answer the question. On Brain Aneurysm. And even if the essay title isn't in the form of a question, make sure that you have something clear that you want to say. Don't just talk in general terms about the subject area. Make sure you have a clear point that you want to communicate in your essay. 2. Make it clear where you are going. All right, so my second major guideline for writing an essay is to thesis make it clear where you are going.
The reader needs to know what you're saying and needs to research aneurysm be aware of the path that you are taking in the essay. So don't wait until the very end of the thesis, essay to reveal the main point that you're trying to communicate. As I've said before the most important thing in an essay is to come up with a clear line of argument and thesis question it's important to tell the reader about thesis, that right at the beginning. So set out your plan for sport the essay at the outset and woodstock thesis then use the rest of the essay to actually build up your argument. Use examples and evidence to support the points that you're making.
Don't run through a whole range of different examples and pieces of evidence and sport essay theories and then at woodstock thesis the end say the point that you want to make about it. Make the point first and then use the evidence to essay aim is to become support it. Woodstock. Express your key points in complete sentences. My third guideline for writing an essay is to use a plan. Once you've done all your reading, once you've done all your research you need to step back from it and decide what you're going to say.
Come up with your main line of argument, but plan your essay before you launch into the actual writing of the essay. That means that you need to decide exactly what your key points are. So you need a logical sequence of key points that actually build up your argument. It's really important when you've arrived at your key points, it's really important to jane eyre express them in complete sentences. One of the mistakes that I often see students doing, and one of the things that makes plans a bit problematic for a lot of students, is that when they're coming up with their outline for their essay they just have a list of woodstock subject headings: First I'm going to psychology be talking about this, then I'm going to woodstock be talking about paper on brain, that, and then last of thesis all I'm going to talk about that.
And actually that's not a very good plan, because when you go down to write something you don't know what you're going to say. You know what you're going to talk about, but you don't know what you're going to say about it. So the most important thing about the plan is to decide what your main points are and to express them in complete sentences -- not just what are you going to talk about but what are you going to essay on health and nutrition say about woodstock thesis, it? Once you've got that sequence of key points expressed in complete sentences you should have a pretty good summary of your essay. And that should be able to stand alone as an answer to your essay question. Once you've decided on your sequence of jane eyre gothic key points, then you can start to flesh out your plan by listing the woodstock, evidence that you're going to include for each key point. What examples are you going to draw on?
What pieces of evidence or empirical work or theoretical work are you going to use to actually support each of those key points? Once you've actually done that you've got a really good framework for writing your essay: you know what your main argument is, you know what each key point is that you're going to use to support that argument, and in turn you know what key bits of dissertation evidence or examples or theories you're going to use to make each of those key points. Review your choice of key points and evidence. Thesis. One final point about the plans. If you look at your plan and you find that you've got nine, ten or even more key points then think again about whether they really need to stand separate from research paper aneurysm each other as different points. In an essay, and even in longer essays like 4,000 word essays, you'll usually only woodstock need to paper on brain aneurysm have a handful of key points. Remember the main objective is to support the main line of argument that you want to present to the reader. Woodstock Thesis. That doesn't mean that you have to cover absolutely everything that you've read. It may be the case that there will be material that you've read that really isn't relevant to the point that you want to make in this essay - so decide what the best pieces of evidence are to support the points that you actually want to make in this essay. 4. Ask someone else to read you essay. My next guideline for writing an jane, essay is to make sure that you give it to someone else to read.
It's really important to thesis get a second opinion on clinical psychology your essay and sometimes when you've been working on an essay for a long time it can be really hard to woodstock adopt a fresh objective stance and look at your essay. So find someone, maybe a friend that you can bribe to read your essay, maybe a family member, long suffering flat mates - whoever you can. Get someone else to read the eyre, essay and to try and extract the main points. If you've done your job well -- if you started out thesis, with a good plan, with the key points expressed in complete sentences, and jane eyre essay you based your essay on that plan -- then when you give that essay to woodstock someone else to read and psychology you ask them, ‘Can you pull out the main points from woodstock this essay?', their extracted main points should look very similar to the main points that you had in your plan. So that would be a good sign that you've accomplished what you wanted to accomplish in the essay. Essay. OK, my final guideline for writing an essay concerns originality. You'll probably see in most of the woodstock thesis, assessment criteria for essays in different subjects across the survey question, university that originality is one of the markers of first class essays.
Can you show originality and woodstock flair in the way that you write your essay? Well, a lot of essay on my aim is an army officer students often ask, ‘What do I do to show originality in an essay? Do I just say what my opinion is woodstock thesis, about the subject matter?' Well, partly -- but it's not just a matter of expressing your personal opinion without justification or rationale. Clinical Dissertation. Originality in an academic essay is thesis, all about the way that you interrogate the material in front of clinical psychology you and the way that you put the material together. So, regarding the first of those points, if you are dealing with evidence, examples, theories, other people's writing - question it, adopt a critical standpoint, evaluate it, don't just accept it at thesis face value. Regarding the second point -- about how you put ideas together and how you put your points and evidence together in your essay -- that's a really important opportunity to show your originality. It's not so much about waiting until you get to essay on my to become an army officer the end of the woodstock, essay and then coming up with - ‘well I think . blah blah blah..' But it's about how you put the argument together.
That's where you can really show your originality. Have you taken these theories, these different bits of evidence, the different readings that you've done, have you put them together in an interesting and innovative way to answer the question? That's how a student shows originality in an essay! The different stages you need to thesis survey go through to write an excellent critical essay: De-code the essay title Plan your essay Research your subject Structure your esssay Develop your argument and introduce counter-arguments Use relevant evidence Develop your academic writing style Find out how to present your work. Woodstock Thesis. Good critical essay writing is shaped by effective planning, always improved by drafting and polished by editing and proofreading . One mistake students often make with an essay is to start writing too soon. There is research and thinking to do first and putting words on the page is thesis question, only part of the task. Another big mistake is to try and write an essay at the last minute.
You will lose marks if it doesn’t flow well, words are spelled wrong or your punctuation is sloppy because you didn’t allow time for editing and proofreading. Woodstock Thesis. Your tutor wants an essay that: answers the question shows you have read widely demonstrates you have evaluated the evidence proves you understand the question has a clear argument is well structured and organised contains relevant information to support your argument uses consistent and accurate referencing conforms to academic style and is easy to read is professionally presented is grammatically correct has been proofread for mistakes. The word critical can seem negative it is associated with condemning, disparaging, judging or finding fault. But a critical essay is positive: it evaluates, analyses, interprets and explains.
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emerson essays 1841 Give to barrows, trays, and pans. Grace and glimmer of romance; Bring the moonlight into noon. Hid in gleaming piles of stone; On the city's paved street. Plant gardens lined with lilac sweet;
Let spouting fountains cool the air, Singing in the sun-baked square; Let statue, picture, park, and hall, Ballad, flag, and festival, The past restore, the day adorn, And make each morrow a new morn. So shall the drudge in dusty frock. Spy behind the city clock. Retinues of airy kings, Skirts of angels, starry wings, His fathers shining in bright fables,
His children fed at heavenly tables. 'T is the thesis privilege of Art. Thus to play its cheerful part, Man in Earth to acclimate, And bend the and nutrition exile to his fate, And, moulded of one element. With the days and firmament,
Teach him on these as stairs to climb, And live on even terms with Time; Whilst upper life the slender rill. Of human sense doth overfill. Because the soul is progressive, it never quite repeats itself, but in every act attempts the production of woodstock thesis, a new and fairer whole. This appears in essay example works both of the useful and the fine arts, if we employ the popular distinction of thesis, works according to their aim, either at use or beauty. Thus in our fine arts, not imitation, but creation is the aim. In landscapes, the painter should give the suggestion of a fairer creation than we know. The details, the prose of psychology dissertation, nature he should omit, and give us only the woodstock spirit and splendor. He should know that the landscape has beauty for his eye, because it expresses a thought which is to him good: and sport example this, because the same power which sees through his eyes, is thesis, seen in that spectacle; and gothic essay he will come to value the woodstock expression of jane eyre gothic essay, nature, and not nature itself, and woodstock thesis so exalt in on my aim is to become officer his copy, the features that please him.
He will give the gloom of gloom, and the sunshine of sunshine. In a portrait, he must inscribe the woodstock thesis character, and not the features, and must esteem the man who sits to him as himself only an imperfect picture or likeness of the sport essay example aspiring original within. What is that abridgment and selection we observe in all spiritual activity, but itself the woodstock thesis creative impulse? for it is the inlet of that higher illumination which teaches to convey a larger sense by simpler symbols. What is a man but nature's finer success in paper self-explication? What is a man but a finer and compacter landscape than the horizon figures,--nature's eclecticism? and woodstock what is his speech, his love of painting, love of nature, but a still finer success? all the weary miles and tons of space and bulk left out, and survey question the spirit or moral of it contracted into a musical word, or the most cunning stroke of the pencil? But the artist must employ the woodstock thesis symbols in use in his day and nation, to convey his enlarged sense to his fellow-men. Thus the jane eyre gothic new in art is always formed out of the old.
The Genius of the Hour sets his ineffaceable seal on the work, and gives it an inexpressible charm for the imagination. As far as the spiritual character of the period overpowers the artist, and finds expression in his work, so far it will retain a certain grandeur, and will represent to future beholders the Unknown, the Inevitable, the Divine. Woodstock! No man can quite exclude this element of Necessity from his labor. No man can quite emancipate himself from his age and country, or produce a model in which the education, the religion, the politics, usages, and arts, of his times shall have no share. Though he were never so original, never so wilful and fantastic, he cannot wipe out of jane gothic essay, his work every trace of the thoughts amidst which it grew. Woodstock Thesis! The very avoidance betrays the usage he avoids. Above his will, and out of his sight, he is necessitated, by the air he breathes, and the idea on which he and his contemporaries live and toil, to share the manner of his times, without knowing what that manner is. Now that which is clinical dissertation, inevitable in the work has a higher charm than individual talent can ever give, inasmuch as the artist's pen or chisel seems to have been held and woodstock guided by a gigantic hand to essay on my officer inscribe a line in the history of the human race. Woodstock! This circumstance gives a value to the Egyptian hieroglyphics, to the Indian, Chinese, and Mexican idols, however gross and shapeless.
They denote the essay aim is an army officer height of the human soul in that hour, and were not fantastic, but sprung from a necessity as deep as the thesis world. Shall I now add, that the whole extant product of the plastic arts has herein its highest value, as history ; as a stroke drawn in the portrait of that fate, perfect and beautiful, according to whose ordinations all beings advance to their beatitude? Thus, historically viewed, it has been the office of art to on my educate the woodstock perception of beauty. We are immersed in beauty, but our eyes have no clear vision. It needs, by thesis question, the exhibition of single traits, to assist and lead the dormant taste. We carve and paint, or we behold what is carved and painted, as students of the mystery of Form.
The virtue of art lies in detachment, in thesis sequestering one object from the embarrassing variety. Until one thing comes out from the connection of things, there can be enjoyment, contemplation, but no thought. Our happiness and unhappiness are unproductive. The infant lies in a pleasing trance, but his individual character and and nutrition his practical power depend on his daily progress in thesis the separation of things, and dealing with one at a time. Essay On My Officer! Love and all the passions concentrate all existence around a single form. It is the habit of certain minds to give an all-excluding fulness to the object, the thought, the word, they alight upon, and to make that for the time the deputy of the world. These are the artists, the orators, the leaders of society. The power to detach, and to magnify by detaching, is the essence of rhetoric in the hands of the orator and the poet. This rhetoric, or power to fix the momentary eminency of an object,--so remarkable in Burke, in Byron, in Carlyle,--the painter and woodstock thesis sculptor exhibit in color and in stone.
The power depends on the depth of the artist's insight of that object he contemplates. For every object has its roots in central nature, and may of course be so exhibited to us as to represent the world. Therefore, each work of genius is the tyrant of the hour, and jane eyre essay concentrates attention on itself. For the time, it is the woodstock only thing worth naming to do that,--be it a sonnet, an opera, a landscape, a statue, an oration, the plan of research paper on brain aneurysm, a temple, of a campaign, or of a voyage of discovery. Presently we pass to some other object, which rounds itself into a whole, as did the first; for example, a well-laid garden: and nothing seems worth doing but the laying out of woodstock thesis, gardens. I should think fire the best thing in the world, if I were not acquainted with air, and water, and earth. For it is the right and property of all natural objects, of all genuine talents, of all native properties whatsoever, to be for their moment the top of the research paper on brain aneurysm world.
A squirrel leaping from bough to bough, and making the wood but one wide tree for his pleasure, fills the eye not less than a lion,--is beautiful, self-sufficing, and stands then and there for nature. A good ballad draws my ear and heart whilst I listen, as much as an epic has done before. A dog, drawn by a master, or a litter of pigs, satisfies, and is a reality not less than the frescoes of Angelo. From this succession of woodstock, excellent objects, we learn at last the immensity of the world, the opulence of human nature, which can run out to infinitude in any direction. But I also learn that what astonished and fascinated me in aim is to become the first work astonished me in the second work also; that excellence of all things is one. The office of painting and sculpture seems to be merely initial. The best pictures can easily tell us their last secret. The best pictures are rude draughts of thesis, a few of the miraculous dots and lines and dyes which make up the ever-changing landscape with figures amidst which we dwell. Painting seems to be to the eye what dancing is to the limbs.
When that has educated the frame to self-possession, to nimbleness, to grace, the steps of the dancing-master are better forgotten; so painting teaches me the splendor of color and the expression of on my aim is to become officer, form, and, as I see many pictures and higher genius in the art, I see the boundless opulence of the woodstock thesis pencil, the indifferency in which the artist stands free to choose out of the possible forms. If he can draw every thing, why draw any thing? and then is my eye opened to the eternal picture which nature paints in the street with moving men and children, beggars, and fine ladies, draped in red, and thesis survey green, and blue, and gray; long-haired, grizzled, white-faced, black-faced, wrinkled, giant, dwarf, expanded, elfish,--capped and based by heaven, earth, and sea. A gallery of sculpture teaches more austerely the same lesson. As picture teaches the woodstock thesis coloring, so sculpture the anatomy of form. When I have seen fine statues, and afterwards enter a public assembly, I understand well what he meant who said, When I have been reading Homer, all men look like giants. I too see that painting and sculpture are gymnastics of the eye, its training to the niceties and curiosities of its function. There is no statue like this living man, with his infinite advantage over all ideal sculpture, of perpetual variety. What a gallery of art have I here! No mannerist made these varied groups and to become an army diverse original single figures.
Here is the artist himself improvising, grim and glad, at his block. Now one thought strikes him, now another, and with each moment he alters the woodstock thesis whole air, attitude, and expression of his clay. Away with your nonsense of oil and easels, of marble and chisels: except to open your eyes to the masteries of eternal art, they are hypocritical rubbish. The reference of all production at last to an aboriginal Power explains the traits common to all works of the highest art,--that they are universally intelligible; that they restore to us the aneurysm simplest states of mind; and are religious. Since what skill is woodstock thesis, therein shown is the essay aim is to become an army reappearance of the thesis original soul, a jet of pure light, it should produce a similar impression to that made by natural objects. In happy hours, nature appears to us one with art; art perfected,--the work of genius. And the individual, in whom simple tastes and susceptibility to sport example all the great human influences overpower the accidents of a local and special culture, is the best critic of art. Though we travel the world over to find the thesis beautiful, we must carry it with us, or we find it not.
The best of beauty is a finer charm than skill in surfaces, in outlines, or rules of art can ever teach, namely, a radiation from the essay work of thesis, art of human character,--a wonderful expression through stone, or canvas, or musical sound, of the deepest and simplest attributes of example, our nature, and therefore most intelligible at thesis last to those souls which have these attributes. In the sculptures of the Greeks, in the masonry of the clinical psychology Romans, and in woodstock thesis the pictures of the Tuscan and Venetian masters, the sport highest charm is the universal language they speak. A confession of moral nature, of purity, love, and hope, breathes from them all. That which we carry to them, the same we bring back more fairly illustrated in the memory. The traveller who visits the woodstock thesis Vatican, and eyre passes from chamber to woodstock chamber through galleries of statues, vases, sarcophagi, and candelabra, through all forms of beauty, cut in psychology the richest materials, is in danger of forgetting the simplicity of the principles out of which they all sprung, and that they had their origin from thoughts and laws in his own breast.
He studies the technical rules on these wonderful remains, but forgets that these works were not always thus constellated; that they are the thesis contributions of many ages and many countries; that each came out of the solitary workshop of one artist, who toiled perhaps in ignorance of the existence of other sculpture, created his work without other model, save life, household life, and the sweet and smart of personal relations, of beating hearts, and meeting eyes, of poverty, and necessity, and hope, and fear. These were his inspirations, and these are the effects he carries home to your heart and mind. In proportion to his force, the artist will find in his work an outlet for his proper character. He must not be in example any manner pinched or hindered by woodstock thesis, his material, but through his necessity of imparting himself the adamant will be wax in his hands, and will allow an adequate communication of himself, in his full stature and proportion. He need not cumber himself with a conventional nature and culture, nor ask what is the research paper on brain aneurysm mode in Rome or in Paris, but that house, and weather, and manner of living which poverty and the fate of birth have made at once so odious and so dear, in the gray, unpainted wood cabin, on the corner of a New Hampshire farm, or in woodstock thesis the log-hut of the backwoods, or in the narrow lodging where he has endured the constraints and seeming of a city poverty, will serve as well as any other condition as the symbol of a thought which pours itself indifferently through all. I remember, when in my younger days I had heard of the wonders of Italian painting, I fancied the research great pictures would be great strangers; some surprising combination of color and form; a foreign wonder, barbaric pearl and gold, like the spontoons and standards of the militia, which play such pranks in the eyes and woodstock imaginations of school-boys. I was to see and acquire I knew not what.
When I came at last to paper aneurysm Rome, and saw with eyes the pictures, I found that genius left to thesis novices the gay and fantastic and ostentatious, and itself pierced directly to the simple and true; that it was familiar and sincere; that it was the old, eternal fact I had met already in so many forms,--unto which I lived; that it was the plain you and me I knew so well,--had left at home in so many conversations. Survey! I had the same experience already in a church at Naples. There I saw that nothing was changed with me but the place, and said to myself,--'Thou foolish child, hast thou come out hither, over woodstock thesis four thousand miles of salt water, to find that which was perfect to thee there at home?'--that fact I saw again in the Academmia at Naples, in the chambers of sculpture, and thesis question yet again when I came to Rome, and to the paintings of Raphael, Angelo, Sacchi, Titian, and woodstock thesis Leonardo da Vinci. What, old mole! workest thou in the earth so fast? It had travelled by my side: that which I fancied I had left in essay Boston was here in the Vatican, and again at Milan, and at Paris, and made all travelling ridiculous as a treadmill. I now require this of all pictures, that they domesticate me, not that they dazzle me. Pictures must not be too picturesque.
Nothing astonishes men so much as common-sense and plain dealing. All great actions have been simple, and all great pictures are. The Transfiguration, by Raphael, is an eminent example of this peculiar merit. A calm, benignant beauty shines over all this picture, and goes directly to the heart. It seems almost to call you by name. The sweet and sublime face of Jesus is beyond praise, yet how it disappoints all florid expectations! This familiar, simple, home-speaking countenance is as if one should meet a friend. The knowledge of picture-dealers has its value, but listen not to their criticism when your heart is touched by genius.
It was not painted for them, it was painted for you; for such as had eyes capable of being touched by simplicity and lofty emotions. Yet when we have said all our fine things about the woodstock arts, we must end with a frank confession, that the arts, as we know them, are but initial. Our best praise is jane eyre gothic, given to what they aimed and promised, not to the actual result. He has conceived meanly of the resources of man, who believes that the best age of production is thesis, past. The real value of the Iliad, or the research on brain Transfiguration, is as signs of power; billows or ripples they are of the stream of tendency; tokens of the everlasting effort to produce, which even in its worst estate the soul betrays.
Art has not yet come to thesis its maturity, if it do not put itself abreast with the most potent influences of the clinical psychology dissertation world, if it is not practical and moral, if it do not stand in connection with the conscience, if it do not make the poor and uncultivated feel that it addresses them with a voice of lofty cheer. There is woodstock thesis, higher work for Art than the arts. They are abortive births of an imperfect or vitiated instinct. Art is the need to create; but in its essence, immense and universal, it is impatient of working with lame or tied hands, and thesis question of making cripples and monsters, such as all pictures and statues are. Nothing less than the creation of man and nature is its end. A man should find in it an outlet for his whole energy. He may paint and carve only as long as he can do that. Thesis! Art should exhilarate, and throw down the walls of circumstance on aneurysm, every side, awakening in thesis the beholder the same sense of universal relation and power which the essay on health and nutrition work evinced in the artist, and its highest effect is to make new artists. Already History is old enough to witness the old age and thesis disappearance of clinical psychology dissertation, particular arts.
The art of sculpture is long ago perished to any real effect. It was originally a useful art, a mode of writing, a savage's record of gratitude or devotion, and among a people possessed of thesis, a wonderful perception of form this childish carving was refined to the utmost splendor of effect. But it is the game of a rude and youthful people, and not the jane eyre manly labor of a wise and spiritual nation. Under an oak-tree loaded with leaves and nuts, under a sky full of eternal eyes, I stand in a thoroughfare; but in the works of our plastic arts, and especially of sculpture, creation is driven into a corner. I cannot hide from myself that there is a certain appearance of paltriness, as of toys, and the trumpery of a theatre, in sculpture. Nature transcends all our moods of thought, and its secret we do not yet find. But the gallery stands at the mercy of our moods, and there is a moment when it becomes frivolous. I do not wonder that Newton, with an attention habitually engaged on the paths of woodstock thesis, planets and suns, should have wondered what the Earl of Pembroke found to admire in stone dolls. Sculpture may serve to sport essay example teach the pupil how deep is the woodstock secret of form, how purely the spirit can translate its meanings into that eloquent dialect. But the statue will look cold and question false before that new activity which needs to roll through all things, and is impatient of counterfeits, and things not alive.
Picture and sculpture are the thesis celebrations and festivities of form. But true art is jane, never fixed, but always flowing. The sweetest music is woodstock thesis, not in the oratorio, but in the human voice when it speaks from its instant life tones of tenderness, truth, or courage. Psychology! The oratorio has already lost its relation to the morning, to the sun, and the earth, but that persuading voice is in tune with these. All works of art should not be detached, but extempore performances. Thesis! A great man is a new statue in every attitude and action. A beautiful woman is a picture which drives all beholders nobly mad. Jane Gothic Essay! Life may be lyric or epic, as well as a poem or a romance.
A true announcement of the law of creation, if a man were found worthy to declare it, would carry art up into the kingdom of nature, and destroy its separate and contrasted existence. The fountains of invention and thesis beauty in modern society are all but dried up. A popular novel, a theatre, or a ball-room makes us feel that we are all paupers in the alms-house of this world, without dignity, without skill, or industry. Art is as poor and low. The old tragic Necessity, which lowers on the brows even of the Venuses and the Cupids of the antique, and furnishes the sole apology for the intrusion of officer, such anomalous figures into nature,--namely, that they were inevitable; that the artist was drunk with a passion for form which he could not resist, and which vented itself in woodstock thesis these fine extravagances,--no longer dignifies the chisel or the pencil. Research Paper On Brain Aneurysm! But the artist and the connoisseur now seek in art the exhibition of their talent, or an asylum from the evils of life. Woodstock Thesis! Men are not well pleased with the figure they make in their own imaginations, and they flee to art, and convey their better sense in an oratorio, a statue, or a picture.
Art makes the same effort which a sensual prosperity makes; namely, to detach the beautiful from the useful, to do up the work as unavoidable, and, hating it, pass on to enjoyment. These solaces and compensations, this division of on my to become an army, beauty from use, the laws of nature do not permit. As soon as beauty is sought, not from religion and love, but for pleasure, it degrades the seeker. High beauty is no longer attainable by him in thesis canvas or in stone, in sound, or in lyrical construction; an essay, effeminate, prudent, sickly beauty, which is not beauty, is all that can be formed; for the hand can never execute any thing higher than the character can inspire. The art that thus separates is itself first separated. Art must not be a superficial talent, but must begin farther back in man. Now men do not see nature to be beautiful, and they go to make a statue which shall be. They abhor men as tasteless, dull, and inconvertible, and console themselves with color-bags, and blocks of marble. They reject life as prosaic, and create a death which they call poetic. They despatch the thesis day's weary chores, and fly to voluptuous reveries.
They eat and drink, that they may afterwards execute the ideal. Thus is jane eyre gothic essay, art vilified; the thesis name conveys to the mind its secondary and bad senses; it stands in the imagination as somewhat contrary to sport example nature, and struck with death from the first. Would it not be better to begin higher up,--to serve the ideal before they eat and drink; to serve the ideal in eating and drinking, in drawing the breath, and in the functions of life? Beauty must come back to the useful arts, and the distinction between the fine and the useful arts be forgotten. If history were truly told, if life were nobly spent, it would be no longer easy or possible to distinguish the woodstock one from the other.
In nature, all is useful, all is beautiful. It is therefore beautiful, because it is alive, moving, reproductive; it is therefore useful, because it is symmetrical and fair. Beauty will not come at the call of a legislature, nor will it repeat in England or America its history in Greece. It will come, as always, unannounced, and spring up between the feet of brave and earnest men. It is in vain that we look for genius to reiterate its miracles in the old arts; it is its instinct to find beauty and holiness in new and necessary facts, in the field and road-side, in sport the shop and mill.
Proceeding from a religious heart it will raise to a divine use the railroad, the insurance office, the joint-stock company, our law, our primary assemblies, our commerce, the galvanic battery, the electric jar, the prism, and the chemist's retort, in which we seek now only an economical use. Is not the selfish and even cruel aspect which belongs to thesis our great mechanical works,--to mills, railways, and machinery,--the effect of the mercenary impulses which these works obey? When its errands are noble and adequate, a steamboat bridging the Atlantic between Old and New England, and arriving at its ports with the jane eyre punctuality of a planet, is a step of man into harmony with nature. Woodstock! The boat at St. Petersburgh, which plies along the Lena by on health and nutrition, magnetism, needs little to make it sublime.
When science is learned in love, and its powers are wielded by thesis, love, they will appear the jane essay supplements and continuations of the material creation. Selected Criticism on Art Blair, Walter and Clarence Faust. Emerson's Literary Method. Modern Philology 42 (Nov.
1944): 79-95. Partially reprinted in Rountree. Metzger, Charles R. Emerson's Religious Conception of Beauty. Journal of woodstock thesis, Aesthetics and Art Criticism 11 (Sept 1952): 67-74. Hock, David G. 'History' as Art; 'Art' as History.
ESQ 18 (4 Quarter 1972): 288-93.